A Good Life
To be honest, I’ve been feeling really good about myself lately and have been contemplating how I’m living a good life, but…
It’s all been a facade.
A delusion based on the principle of self-interest.
My own personal interests have diverted my own good intent to live for the interest of others.
Let me explain in more detail.
For the past two months, I’ve been living and working in Gulu, Uganda with a non-profit humanitarian & development organization called Invisible Children. It’s been an incredible two months that have been built up from a desire to live selflessly and to put the interest of others before my own; to give up plans for a successful career and a life full of comfort, convenience, choices and commodities.
I’m currently in Uganda and I haven’t been able to give up any of those things. Sure, they may look, feel and taste a lot different in Uganda, but in and of themselves they’re the same vices.
It’s a constant day-to-day struggle to invite God into the day and live a life in pursuit of righteousness and holiness.
The reason I said that my “good life” is a façade is because the second I over-value my existence I loose touch with the reality of humility. If I think I’m “good” than I’m actually in need. When I think I’m “humble” I’m actually dealing with pride.
“What passes for goodness of heart? Remember, we are fallen beings, born in sin, and by nature depraved. Christian faith does not begin with the premise of innocence or goodness of heart. That is optimistic humanism, not authentic faith. Christianity proclaims the need for forgiveness and transformation. We are not what we were meant to be.” – William Wilberforce
I’m in a state of mind where I desperately need forgiveness and transformation.
"Selfishness will always avoid acknowledging the truth that we are selfish."
I don’t want to avoid this knowledge anymore. I know that I’m selfish and need to depend on mercy and grace to be lifted out of the darkness that tempts me.
Thank you for your prayers and support. They continue to “lift me up” as a brother in Christ. It’s been too long since I’ve thanked those who’ve continued to support me financially over the years…Thank You. A lot of people are going through financial difficulties (including Invisible Children) and your financial support is humbling & enriching. Thank you, thank you & thank you.
